but i'm bak!!! YAY!!! look i found this awesome website....
www.anointedyouth.org
guess what....i got saved in June...i love it and i want to share that with you.....go to....
www.blogs.anointedyouth.org/lovinthelord
you'll love it!!!
-megan
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
im so blessed
today is the last day of skool and all ive done today was hangout with my BEST friend josh...and riley...and ben...and brittany and luis....he's from Brazil and he's really cool....
today like there were only 40 kids at skool...everyone is taking pics and crying (not me) and skipping class and its total chaos and its so much fun....as i was walking behind my group of friends as we moved from room to room I thought about my whole year....these were the ppl there for me when i needed them...friends are great and its amazing the ppl that i have met....im going to talk about each one....
Brittany....at first we sorta didnt like each other...but when we had to spend an hour and a half together for about 5 months we finally got around to tolerating each other and then....she and i became friends...she was the first person that i told that i was a victim of rape and she kept my secret...she never told anyone until she asked me if she could tell josh....
ben...well...i met him because of josh...and at first i really was a little scared of him...but he was so hilarious that i couldnt just not be nice to him...its not like i was going to be mean cuz i was scared of him...its just i am sort of unwelcoming to the unfamiliar....
i met riley last semester and he made fun of me cuz i talk with my hands....everytime i see him...i cant hold a strait face...riley is a little wild and unruley but he is a great person....
luis...is from BRAZIL!! i think that is so cool....like i met him last semester and at first we didnt talk cuz i was again...unwelcoming to the unfamiliar....but once i got him to talk we always had fun..until ms. moore started to teach....he is a really nice person and he's totally cool...
and finally....josh mitchell...um....what can i say about him.......hmmmmmmmmmm...lol!! no...at first he was dating brittany and well...i met him in first block and well...we couldnt stand each other like at all...i could have killed him a million times...but then we started talking like....just saying stuff to each other every now and then but we really didnt acknowledge each other....then....i was fed up and i thought i need to at least make one friend and well...josh seemed like the only good choice...definitely not mason!!! brittany understands!!! well...then we were sorta friends and then we were okay friends and then we were good friends and now he's my best friend...and i thank god for him everyday...like i dont tell anyone the stuff that i tell him...its so weird that i can tell him these things....any hoo..he's cool in other words...
today was great and i thank god for blessing me with knowing these 6 ppl...i love my friends
today like there were only 40 kids at skool...everyone is taking pics and crying (not me) and skipping class and its total chaos and its so much fun....as i was walking behind my group of friends as we moved from room to room I thought about my whole year....these were the ppl there for me when i needed them...friends are great and its amazing the ppl that i have met....im going to talk about each one....
Brittany....at first we sorta didnt like each other...but when we had to spend an hour and a half together for about 5 months we finally got around to tolerating each other and then....she and i became friends...she was the first person that i told that i was a victim of rape and she kept my secret...she never told anyone until she asked me if she could tell josh....
ben...well...i met him because of josh...and at first i really was a little scared of him...but he was so hilarious that i couldnt just not be nice to him...its not like i was going to be mean cuz i was scared of him...its just i am sort of unwelcoming to the unfamiliar....
i met riley last semester and he made fun of me cuz i talk with my hands....everytime i see him...i cant hold a strait face...riley is a little wild and unruley but he is a great person....
luis...is from BRAZIL!! i think that is so cool....like i met him last semester and at first we didnt talk cuz i was again...unwelcoming to the unfamiliar....but once i got him to talk we always had fun..until ms. moore started to teach....he is a really nice person and he's totally cool...
and finally....josh mitchell...um....what can i say about him.......hmmmmmmmmmm...lol!! no...at first he was dating brittany and well...i met him in first block and well...we couldnt stand each other like at all...i could have killed him a million times...but then we started talking like....just saying stuff to each other every now and then but we really didnt acknowledge each other....then....i was fed up and i thought i need to at least make one friend and well...josh seemed like the only good choice...definitely not mason!!! brittany understands!!! well...then we were sorta friends and then we were okay friends and then we were good friends and now he's my best friend...and i thank god for him everyday...like i dont tell anyone the stuff that i tell him...its so weird that i can tell him these things....any hoo..he's cool in other words...
today was great and i thank god for blessing me with knowing these 6 ppl...i love my friends
Monday, May 28, 2007
im not a good person
it sucks big time...i am talking about this year...see i made sortof a goal or something that i wanted to do...at least i thought i did...i wasnt going to date this year...well...i didnt..we have one more day of skool and well..i have been doing good but it just sucks cuz...everyone thinks im a happy little girl that has no problems and tons of friends...but i probably have 100x's more problems than they do...
oh well...at least i have my best friend...josh mitchell is the greatest you guys...sure he's a little...um...whats the word...wild...but talking to him and just jokin around with him is really great pick me up..you know...it helps me cheer up..even if only for a second...oh well..just dont do what i do and talk about it...i dont do that at all...josh tries to pry it out of me..like my problems but i dont tell him the whole thing...i know its lame..just dont follow my example..everyone thinks i am such a good girl but im not a good person at all..dont follow my example...k?
talk about your problems..dont leave them bottled up...K? and if you have a best friend that is realy great like josh..then talk to them...that's what they're there for...they'll help you..if they're anything like josh..even tho i dont tell him everything or the full extent of my problems still..he really is great and that is the way friends should be....
oh well...at least i have my best friend...josh mitchell is the greatest you guys...sure he's a little...um...whats the word...wild...but talking to him and just jokin around with him is really great pick me up..you know...it helps me cheer up..even if only for a second...oh well..just dont do what i do and talk about it...i dont do that at all...josh tries to pry it out of me..like my problems but i dont tell him the whole thing...i know its lame..just dont follow my example..everyone thinks i am such a good girl but im not a good person at all..dont follow my example...k?
talk about your problems..dont leave them bottled up...K? and if you have a best friend that is realy great like josh..then talk to them...that's what they're there for...they'll help you..if they're anything like josh..even tho i dont tell him everything or the full extent of my problems still..he really is great and that is the way friends should be....
Thursday, May 17, 2007
I think I get it now
Last nite i was about to get ready to take a shower when I turned on my CD player. My sister's "Casting Crowns" cd was in...i didn't want to go get anything else so I let it play...as I let my water run I stared in the mirror and listened to the words of the song "Praise you in this Storm" what I'm going through is my very own storm. I know that nothing is going to happen to my cousin now but if I just keep my faith and keep praising God he will take care of it...
If anyone is going through anything that is so bad you feel like there is nothing else you could do let me just tell you that God is there...he is waiting on you to make the decision to come to him...I never want anyone to go through what I went through so...if you need someone to talk to just drop me a comment and I will try my best to help....
If anyone is going through anything that is so bad you feel like there is nothing else you could do let me just tell you that God is there...he is waiting on you to make the decision to come to him...I never want anyone to go through what I went through so...if you need someone to talk to just drop me a comment and I will try my best to help....
Monday, May 14, 2007
My Story
I haven't posted anything new on here in a while...i had to get a new account. Any hoo, im megan and this is my story. It's pretty tough to tell but if it can help at least one person then its all okay.
I was born too early and I almost died at birth. Luckily I didn't die so I can tell you that everything ends up okay. Well, when i was born I was premature. I was 4lbs and 11oz. I was so small that I had to wear baby doll clothes. If i didn't gain a certain amount of weight by the end of the next month that my mom had me they were going to take me away. I gained the weight...I left the hospital...and up until 1999...when I was 6...everything was great...
well...sorta great...my real dad left my mom and me and my sister when i was 3...she met my step dad a little while afterwards...everything was great until July 4, 1999. My oldest step brother Brandon went fishing down the road and he ran into a hornets nest and was stung over 200 times and he drowned. It was really hard for me...i had nightmares for the longest and the only way for me to go to sleep was if i wore Brandon's old polo shirt...well...if you think things are bad so far...they only get worse...unfortunately...
my real dad didnt really get me and my sister that often and well we were really happy when he did get us....when he did usually he would get our other two sisters, Amanda and JEssica...we loved seeing them....well...in 2001...Jessica went to Iat Lake and shot herself....for so long I tired to tell myself that she didn't but I know that it's not true...there's nothing to be ashamed of...that's why i'm telling everyone this...i do not want what happened to my sister to happen to anyone else...
I thought i was okay about Brandon and Jessica and then when I turned 11 I started noticing that I was sad all the time...it seemed like it didnt take much to hurt my feelings or make me mad....I thought it was just a stage i was going through..but it never stopped...i tried to kill myself...when i was 12....i've never told anyone...thank god that I stopped...for a while I tried to make everything okay....and I thought I was okay...and then my mom was worried about me and brought me to the doctor...last November I was diagnosed with depression...I tried to hide it...but I now know that it's not something that I should be ashamed of ....i bet that most ppl that i know would never had expected that all of this would be happening to me...i have mastered the "plastic smile"...at skool or around town when Isee my friends I pretend that everything is okay even when they're not...i am trying so hard to stop that because if there is a problem you need to talk about it...i found that it really helps...or do what I'm doing..write about it....
we're almost done....a few weeks ago..during spring break...i went over to my cousin's house....we were going to a party next door and I wasnt ready to go yet so I went into my cousin's room and talked with him... i fell asleep a little while later and when i woke up i was scared to death...my cousin had tried to rape me....i pretended not to know and i ran away...i haven't talked to my cousin since....shortly after (i promise it gets better) i accepted God into my heart for real....it's been the best decision i could ever make...the only one that i dont regret....god is there for you..all you have to do is call him out...he'll be the one there for you when you're all alone and feel like you're about to die....just call to him and i promise even though it may be hard during your life...it's all worth it in the end....thank you....
I was born too early and I almost died at birth. Luckily I didn't die so I can tell you that everything ends up okay. Well, when i was born I was premature. I was 4lbs and 11oz. I was so small that I had to wear baby doll clothes. If i didn't gain a certain amount of weight by the end of the next month that my mom had me they were going to take me away. I gained the weight...I left the hospital...and up until 1999...when I was 6...everything was great...
well...sorta great...my real dad left my mom and me and my sister when i was 3...she met my step dad a little while afterwards...everything was great until July 4, 1999. My oldest step brother Brandon went fishing down the road and he ran into a hornets nest and was stung over 200 times and he drowned. It was really hard for me...i had nightmares for the longest and the only way for me to go to sleep was if i wore Brandon's old polo shirt...well...if you think things are bad so far...they only get worse...unfortunately...
my real dad didnt really get me and my sister that often and well we were really happy when he did get us....when he did usually he would get our other two sisters, Amanda and JEssica...we loved seeing them....well...in 2001...Jessica went to Iat Lake and shot herself....for so long I tired to tell myself that she didn't but I know that it's not true...there's nothing to be ashamed of...that's why i'm telling everyone this...i do not want what happened to my sister to happen to anyone else...
I thought i was okay about Brandon and Jessica and then when I turned 11 I started noticing that I was sad all the time...it seemed like it didnt take much to hurt my feelings or make me mad....I thought it was just a stage i was going through..but it never stopped...i tried to kill myself...when i was 12....i've never told anyone...thank god that I stopped...for a while I tried to make everything okay....and I thought I was okay...and then my mom was worried about me and brought me to the doctor...last November I was diagnosed with depression...I tried to hide it...but I now know that it's not something that I should be ashamed of ....i bet that most ppl that i know would never had expected that all of this would be happening to me...i have mastered the "plastic smile"...at skool or around town when Isee my friends I pretend that everything is okay even when they're not...i am trying so hard to stop that because if there is a problem you need to talk about it...i found that it really helps...or do what I'm doing..write about it....
we're almost done....a few weeks ago..during spring break...i went over to my cousin's house....we were going to a party next door and I wasnt ready to go yet so I went into my cousin's room and talked with him... i fell asleep a little while later and when i woke up i was scared to death...my cousin had tried to rape me....i pretended not to know and i ran away...i haven't talked to my cousin since....shortly after (i promise it gets better) i accepted God into my heart for real....it's been the best decision i could ever make...the only one that i dont regret....god is there for you..all you have to do is call him out...he'll be the one there for you when you're all alone and feel like you're about to die....just call to him and i promise even though it may be hard during your life...it's all worth it in the end....thank you....
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